I dont know whether to delete it or not, its gotten pretty lame since the majority of people I know aren’t about that life anymore. Only reason why I keep it are for old friends, co-workers and people I just don’t keep updated with. Plus lately it seems like I only keep up with it to post about sports or find someone I just met. Other than that its useless and slowly turning into Myspace with all the ratchets and hood dudes who post 10 statuses in an hour…
After a day thinking about it, there is actually still some passion left in me. Im climbing to the top no matter what. I’ve started from the bottom (no Drake though) and trust me it aint pretty or the life I want to raise a family in. I still have so much to prove to myself and everyone since I’ve been overlooked and slept on for years. The difference between me and you is, I’ve been the same person through the struggle and through my brief moments when I shine.
I think the biggest mistakes in my life is when I stop trying. I’ve been broke and its not a fun place to be. I’ve lost good friends over the years and it gets pretty lonely. I’ve dropped out of school and it gets degrading being a statistic and being told you’re not gonna make something out of yourself.
Im pretty glad I self reflected the past few days. It gives me another angle to look at my situation and remind myself to keep pushing on and on. Im not in a bad position unless I set myself in one. Im far from where I want to be, but I’m definitely on the right track to get there one day.
Im in a position I’ve never been in. Everything has been going smooth, but I have no interest in anything or anyone lately. I hate taking it day by day but ohh well. Im pretty sure somethings gonna pop up one of these days.
"Whats Big Dreams Without a Few Nightmares?"
Went to my first ever Portland Timbers game this past weekend on 4.6.13
My entire experience was more than I expected. Me and Eric got soaked in the rain but what more says PORTLAND without the rain? The Timbers Army were chanting all game making the whole vibe exciting. Ryan Johnson netted 2 goals against Houston and I got HYPED. Dropped a $9 beer and that was no bueno. Timber Joey also came by the sidelines and we got to touch the two pieces of Timber they cut off after a goal.
Cant wait to go to another one this summer/fall! We got front row seats for $40 and even if you arent close, the pitch looks huge even if you are far away. One of the most memorable nights of my life especially getting the first W of the 2013 MLS Season. PTFC!!!!
I have about 1-2 months left on my contract for the Nike IHM. I dont know whether to come back after 3 months of being laid off, a new job, school, job and school or what.
If I do go back, I still want to be guaranteed a Black Badge with the full benefits. I just dont want to be stuck there busting my ass off again for another yearly contract as a temp, fuck that.
On the other hand school is still a huge priority no matter if its soon or the future its a must. I really want to get it out of the way.
My first big decision of the year so far, and I’m literally stuck at which route I want to start my career with.
In either directions there will be risks. My perfect solution would be to acquire my black badge, work and go to school at the same time and no life it for a few years. I will also get a little of my tuition paid for, and Nike takes care of their own so I get the better plug into a job at campus.
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
I wanna travel to England or Spain and watch a live soccer game. Preferably Manchester City or Barcelona. Soccer has quickly become one of my favorite sports to watch just a little behind College Football and still miles behind NBA Basketball.
Take that America fuck what you think about Soccer, it truly is the world’s sport. I rather watch a Premier League match then majority of NFL games. True story.
I dont get why some women pencil in their eyebrows. 99% of the time it looks fake/ugly as hell. Seems like they look surprised or angry…like one facial expression or a anime character. Random ass thought of the morning.
I have trust issues. Even with the people I do trust, I don’t trust completely.
Work has been an annoyance lately. I hate everyone I work with and my position. I don’t want to sound cocky but I know my potential has not been tapped yet. I guess this is the price I pay for throwing my high school years to waste.
I feel like I have more passion and knowledge than the people thats been there for years. I feel like I connect better with the engineers and higher up people because I get what they’re saying. Its really annoying because I cant do nothing about it besides duck my head and get hired on as a black badge.
Once that happens, I am definitely taking my ass back to school and aiming to work at the Nike campus and I put that on my mom. Im just tired of dealing with stupid ass people. I dont mean the regular joes and janes that work there to provide for their families and what not. But the people who think they know wassup and think less of others are the ones that piss me the fuck off.
Anyways it still feels good to vent on Tumblr. Just wish I got more time for this!!
I miss those days. Taking chances and not being afraid of the outcome. Doing the lamest things all day and it was still fun. Basketball @ the park from lunch till sunset. When I was actually good at school. When I could write for days. When dreams were limitless. When watching tv with your friends all day was cool. When swag wasn’t even used in the english language. When girls had cooties and picking on em was how you showed you liked them. When breaking bones and scrapping your knees didnt suck. When picking on kids was calling them ugly. When school assemblies was our social media. When $20 made you think you can buy EVERYTHING. When basketball was on NBC. When walking 30 minutes wasnt far. When AIM was the shit. When going to the movies on Friday was the highlight of your weekend.
Honestly, I just miss being a kid. It just seems I’m growing up too fast and the years went too soon.
Soooooooo excited for mine this year. I prepared it by myself for the first time and I’m actually getting a big return. I dont know what I want to do with it yet. I promise to only buy a car when I’m fully hired on with Nike so I might wait and sit with the money.
I’m looking forward to start investing with it, or taking a trip to SoCal. Can’t make up my mind!
Might go under to the dark side and cop these Reebok Ex-0 boots for Winter 2013. No one has to know these are Reebok ha since I’m not allowed to rock anything Adidas.
Death vol. Debbie Downer
It seems lately that death has struck a lot of people around me. Dont get me wrong, Ive been happy as hell lately, but just a lot of people I know within this past year or two has died. My boy Chai just lost his mom yesterday to a few various forms of cancer, and its just made me think. About how I’m living my life and treating my health.
Its crazy. I know I’m still young but diseases can strike anyone. I might need to reconsider a few things and approach a way to live a healthier life. May you rest in peach Miangh Khu and I know im butchering the hell out of my language but at least I think thats how I call you and spell it. My boy Chai is always one of the happiest people I know and always laughing, I hope this doesnt change him too much.
Another thing I need to focus on this year is visiting more of my family and cousins. Its been a while since I’ve actually been in a cousins house or talked to one. One Love.